>>> Trudging through the...

... endless wastes of Limbo. Or should that be Purgatory? Heh. 'Tever.

Today, someone asked me what is happiness. To be exact, what is my temporal happiness.

Now, how the hell do you answer something like that? It's quite a spot to be in, to be honest. My mind just went blank; I really couldn't think of anything as a reply.

But thinking about it on the way home, I've realized that I've been so busy trying to get my feet planted back on the ground that I've forgotten what I've been chasing all this while; what will make me HAPPY.

You know how we all have goals and objectives in life that we try to reach? Well, piece of advice, mate, don't ever lose sight of it. And figure out a way to achieve it; won't be easy, but nothing ever is.

Though right about now, I could really use a break. *looks skywards* You readin' me?

*sighs*

All I want in life, honestly, is to be able to create art, share it with others and, if I'm really lucky, teach & inspire as well. Well, not all, I suppose. I would like to be loved for who I am, without reservation nor hidden motives & agendas.

But apparently, that's too much to ask, isn't it. *scowls* Just too much, right?

FEH.

Money is just the means towards an end. Or ends, if the case calls for it. But, in trying to clear myself of certain shackles, I've forgotten everything in my neverending chase for cash and financial independence. *sad sigh*

I am TIRED. I am honestly fed up of having to deal with people and other things that, some-bloody-how, always involves me having to give up my bloody happiness/comfort/whatever to accommodate these others. How about someone give up their bit for me, huh? FOR FUCKING ONCE!?

Oh, but then again, I let people walk all over me. All the time. SO, therefore, it must be my own damn fault.

Probably.

After all, I'm my own worst enemy. Right?

RIGHT.

Ergo, my own fault for letting all the crap happen to me.

I've realised that I've turned this from a contemplative passage on happiness to a bitter rant. FUCK. I'm just too tired, too frustrated and too bitter.

I'M SORRY.

You lot have a nice December ahead. I wish I could hibernate and not wake up at all.

'Night.

_{EDIT: This is NOT directed at nor specifically targeting anyone in particular.}

>>> Her Knives Chau...

... to my Scott Pilgrim?

It's been almost a month since I've been back here. Time does fly when you're as busy as anything.

And, to be rather honest, feeling lazy and often not too sure what to post up here. Strange, neh?

*shrugs*

This entry of mine might turn out to be more of a place holder than anything, really. I've read all the Scott Pilgrim graphic novels plus a coupla dozen novels in the past month, I'm working hard on the SHOELACE MAFIA label idea and dealing with the torrent of ideas tumbling around in my cranium while trying to manage everything else that Life is throwing at me. *shrug* And all of this doesn't make much for a riveting read, SO...

... I'm off to meet peeps and skate. Still not tooo sure if I should carry my inlines.

Probably not.

Heh.

Have a good one, you lot.

LATERS.

>>> An interesting way...

... to design lyrics.

Take five of your favourite songs/tracks from different bands and/or genres, read through their lyrics, pick the lines you like, write 'em out and play jigsaw with them until you get somehing that looks plausibly workable.

Only thing missing now is a working tune/composition. Any volunteers?

It's The Way (You Look At Me)
A Bombshell In Parliament

Make the sadness go away
Come back another day
I see the sadness in your eyes
Melancholy in your cries
When you scream aloud

I've never seen the point
in you killing you
I'll always bite my tongue
to comfort you
This is what I'll die for
I'll save you

It's the way you look at me
With eyes that see off into infinity
It's the way your whispers
seem to kiss my ears
But still, you push me on to see

Again and again and again
you're in everything
And again I see your face
in everything around me
This is what I'll die for
I'll save you

When you scream aloud
I see the sadness in your eyes
Melancholy in your cries
Make the sadness go away
Come back another day

(Our love will have its day)

A Bombshell In Parliament is currently a band that can be considered a work in progress, having only two members at the moment. Of which only one can passably play a musical instrument. But they have big dreams, so in our usual way of supporting those who dream big and plan/plot to blast away to the stars & beyond, we're plugging their insanity before they even do anything, haha!!!

That and the fact that we're all attention whores doesn't hurt as well, hahahahaha!!!

This is also dedicated to the one and only Supernova.

Who just might kill us for publishing the song for the masses since it was originally inspired by and composed for her.

Oh, well, if so, we'd go to our deaths gladly, with a smile on our faces!

*cackles of laughter in the background*

Laters!

>>> Hold on...

... we should be together.

*sigh*

The following song is a favourite of mine and Supernova's... and right about now, it has me on the brink of, well, something. I'm not sure what. Not sure whether it's negative or not, but we'll see. *shrug* The song holds a lot of power, just let it seep through the pores of your being and infect your soul.

Anyways...

I love the band 53A [SUPPORT LOCAL!] and they're such awesome people who deserve so much support and [Macbethian] love! Catch them at Timbre and on Twitter & Facebook. SEARCH for 53A. *grins*

GO GET THEIR ALBUM, AVAILABLE AT STARBUCK OUTLETS ALL OVER THE LION CITY! YOU WON'T REGRET IT!! I SWEAR!!!

For those not from around here, just check out this song. If you want their album, just let me know through the comments section here and I'll work something out with the band.

For now, sit back or curl up in your chair and enjoy the song. *smiles and bows*

We Should Be Together
Settle the Kettle
53A

I don’t ever want to let you go
I don’t ever want you hurt
I don’t ever want another guy
Baby don’t even try

Maybe if I stay
Why would you wanna leave
Will we ever agree?
Will we ever agree.
But if everyone says

Hold on we should be together
If that’s wrong I don’t wanna be right
If you love me then stay on
Just tell me to be strong
Cause no one else
Will understand

Why I have a smile when you’re around
Y’know it’s hard to see that
Lately I have been in a daze
Baby everything stays

Maybe if I stay
Why would you wanna leave
Will we ever agree?
Will we ever agree.
But if everyone says

Hold on we should be together
If that’s wrong I don’t wanna be right
If you love me then stay on
Just tell me to be strong
Cause no one else
Will understand

That we’re in love
That we’re in love.

@Supernova: Know that you're loved always and missed when you're not near. *sigh*

>>> Three more days...

... to a birthday that I usually detest with a passion.

BUT, I'm hoping that this year is almost as good as last year's, if anyone remembers Purple's surprise party that she threw for me at Fish & Co in Dhoby. *sighs with a sad smile* Memories... memories... *sighs and shakes his head*

ANYWAYS.

Though usually I do not get any birthday presents, I seem to have gotten some even before the day itself. Or the promises of some, in certain cases. Purple is treating me to a much needed - and deserved, in my honest opinion - full body massage at a Javanese massage studio/spa in Upper Thomson followed by dinner at a restaurant later. We're still not sure what restaurant since I still can't decide. Supernova's ordered something from Australia which is going to a surprise and the curiousity is eating me alive from the inside. [Thank you very much, baby!] *laughs* She's a such a darling, she's loaned me a coupla hundred quid for my tattoo, which is my gift to myself. The photos will be posted up somewhere after it's done on my birthday. If you want to know about the design, well, all I can say is that the Label is In God's Hands on the XIII'th. *laughs some more*

Purple's mom insisted on getting me three pairs of tailored trousers and I, in my absolute boringness, chose the simple matt black fabric for them. I'll be trying them tonight when I get home after work.

Supernova still wants to take me either flowboarding or to Timbre. She's still thinking about it. I'll just go along with whatever she decides. *grins*

Well, that's about it for presents and birthday plans.

Currently, I'm planning on practicing for the Meeting of Styles in KL. I wanna kill it while I'm there, so I really need to do some hardcore practicing. Probably have to hit the practice grounds at Bukit Batok skate-park. Either that or my room, haha! And sketching, which I've started again. I hadn't realized how much I've missed sketching and graffiti in general.

Even if it the majority of the scene is geared towards ego games and trying to outdo each others' styles. *sighs while rolling eyes upwards*

Also on the design side of things, I'm currently working on my own t-shirt line for skaters. Called the SHOELACE MAFIA, I have about nine to ten designs lined up to sketch out and then finalize. So, to that end, I'm working on collecting suitable fonts and reference images to help me in the designing stages. After that's done, that's when I start looking into the business end of it all. *taps chin thoughtfully* I have a couple of people that I could ask for guidance, advice and such. (Supernova, One Egg & the 13th Greater Evil?) I'm really stoked about this project, and I'm determined to see it through to the end. I'll like to thank my extended family and certain loved ones for their support and enthusiasm. It's contagiously infectious! *leaps in the air with fists thrown up*

In addition, I may just be able to finally finish my Air Gear inspired hooded zip-up sweater/sweatshirt. A friend [Juice] just told me recently about a small store in the Army Market that makes custom embroidered patches which definitely warrants checking out. PLUS, I've finally found fabric to line the insides of the hoodie - including the inside of the hood - and believe it or not, it's actually fabric meant for a curtain! *chuckles* The weird things that I find. In addition, I've found the old front panel of this old tee that I'd cut out which has a really cool stencil-like design on it. I'm going to get it fitted/sewed over the right panel of the hoodie, and it's doubly awesome since the panels are similar colour so it should fit seamlessly! Just have to get the patches done and find a suitable zipper of the correct length to fit to the hoodie. And it will be in the reversed direction just to be different! XD

I'm pretty hyped about the concluding this little project that's been in the works for almost two years now. Amazing, isn't it?

On a side note, I had a craving for Skittles. And am now the proud possesor of a relatively largish bag of the stuff. Kiddy-like smiles all around. And apparently Lain likes the green ones. ONLY the green ones. *laughs*

Well, I'm truly blessed in certain areas of my life.

Even though my family life is the pits and completely messed up most times, I'm still blessed and thankful for what I have.

^{Someday we gonna rise up on that wind you know
Someday we gonna dance with those lions
Someday we gonna break free from these chains and keep on flyin'.}

With that, I'm off to get some other stuff done.

Peace.