>>> Self-hate...

... is dangerous.

So is self-loathing.

Which amounts to roughly the same thing, doesn't it?

And I pretty much hate myself right now since I can't seem to do anything right. Or, at this present moment, it feels that way.

And the stress over school, my school assignments-cum-assessments, the search for a part-time job, the upcoming sale of my home [of the last 14 years], my need to find a place to live and my girlfriend is eating away at me and causing mad insecurity.

At least, I'm aware of it. I just wish that I knew how to deal with it. Not that I'm not trying. It just sucks how lost and confused I am at the moment and how much of a jackass that I feel I am.

Will things ever get better???

F***.

I dunno.

Sigh.

Laters, Gaters.

>>> Headaches and migraines...

... split my head asunder.

And where do these stupid bundles of wondrous pain come from?

I have absolutely no idea.

They strike from out of nowhere, the sneaky li'l commando-like bastards.

For example, I could be standing on the train, minding my own bloody business when, suddenly, my cranium will feel like it's been forcefully chucked into the torturous squeeze of a vice.

Like right about now...

*sighs in frustration*

... I have so much [school]work to do and this has to happen now.

I do not want to take painkillers because if I do, my tolerance will just build and I'll have to switch to stronger ones. And mine are pretty strong as they are. I wonder how my liver is holding up against those pills?

Does this kinda thing happen to YOU? At all? Ever?

Lemme know, aiight?

*exhales slowly*

Well, back to work...

But before I go, a HUGE SHOUT-OUT OF MASSIVE THANKS TO MY MAN LOUIS FOR PASSING ME THE HIFANA TRACKS. YOU'RE A SAINT, MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!

... Laters, Gaters!

Peace!